My LIfe in a Nutshell

Author Tanya J. Peterson does not shy away from difficult subjects in her books.  Having read two earlier, impressive books by Tanya J. Peterson, Losing Elizabeth (2012) and Leave of Absence (2013), I wanted to also read her new novel, which has been nominated for the Kirkus Prize, My Life in a Nutshell, published in 2014.  Dedicated to the millions of people worldwide who live with anxiety disorders, My Life in a Nutshell, like Leave of Absence, is a novel about the debilitating effects of untreated mental illness.   

"I'm trapped.  My chest constricts even more, and I'm suffocating.  I feel like I can't get enough oxygen, and my lungs spasm again in a loud cough.  Now that I've started coughing fully, I can't stop."
~ My Life in a Nutshell, Tanya J. Peterson

My Life in a Nutshell is written in the first person from the point of view of Brian Cunningham, a school custodian who suffers from severe anxiety and frequent panic attacks.  Tanya J. Peterson paints an astonishing, realistic picture of thirty-seven-year old Brian, who's mourning the recent loss of his dog, Oscar.  The author presents his thoughts in a believable and often heartbreaking manner.  Depressed and full of self-loathing, Brian dreads interaction with people, and avoids it as much as possible.  In spite of his feelings, he cares a lot about his work, and he genuinely wants to help others.  On the first day of the new school year, he discovers Abigail Harris, a seven-year-old foster child who's been abused and who now lives with her aunt and uncle, hiding behind his cleaning cart in the mechanical room at school.  After he helps her put on her shoes, she asks Brian if she can live with him.  This chance meeting is the beginning of a new chapter in their lives. 

If I had to describe this book in one word, I'd choose the word intense.  Through the thoughts of the protagonist, I felt as if I were experiencing the chronic, agonizing anxiety and panic attacks that afflict Brian.  My Life in a Nutshell is powerful, incredibly real and compelling.  I felt immediate empathy for Brian and Abigail as I read this book.  Both characters are quite likable, and it made sense that their friendship would help them.

From the first chapter, I was hooked by this book.  Brian's story convincingly depicts mental illness, and I was swiftly drawn into his world.  He's a wonderful, caring person, yet he calls himself an idiot in the first line of the book; he loathes himself.  It is heartbreaking.  I wanted to find out why Brian felt the way he did about himself (readers do not learn about what happened in his life or its aftermath until much later in the book).  He's led a socially isolated life, is very uncomfortable in social settings, and has only one friend, the day custodian, Roger.  Although Brian suffers from extreme anxiety and struggles on a daily basis, he's a good and kind person, and he's also quite intelligent, and particularly sensitive to the needs of Abigail.  Brian knows he needs to deal with his recurring, troublesome anxiety, but he has a hard time getting that help, for numerous reasons.  Very reluctantly, Brian goes to a counseling appointment that his mother has set up with Dr. Beth Greene. The first appointment is not easy for him, but he does realize that the counseling will help him to cope.

As Brian and Abigail form an attachment to each other, they help each other, and the story is ultimately about friendship and love, and trust and hope, which all contribute to mental health.  My Life in a Nutshell highlights the value and importance of mental health.  It shows that purpose and positive social interaction contribute to mental health, and that counseling may help, in many instances.  Brian's thoughts are a major part of this story, which make you think about your own self-dialogue: are you mostly positive or negative?  Are your thoughts obsessive, or healthy?  In a more general sense, the book compels us to be less judgmental of others, and more understanding.  It reminds us not to evaluate others solely (and negatively) on the basis of occupation ("dumb" janitor, "lazy" housewife, etc.); get to know people--you might be surprised!  My Life in a Nutshell is a wonderful and hopeful book that I'm honored to have read.  Although often overlooked, mental health is an extremely important facet of overall health.

Warm thanks to author Tanya J. Peterson, who writes sensitively and beautifully about a challenging subject, for inviting me to participate in her book tour and for sending me a copy of her book.  For more reviews of this book, please visit the other stops on the My Life in a Nutshell book tour.

Thanks for reading!  Your comments are welcomed.

Leave of Absence: Review and Giveaway

Having read an earlier novel by Tanya J. Peterson, Losing Elizabeth, a story about a young girl with a boyfriend who becomes increasingly controlling and violent, I had a feeling that the author's new book, Leave of Absence, published in 2013, would also be intense.  I was not mistaken. In the opening chapter of Leave of Absence, Oliver Graham is about to jump off the roof of an eighteen-story building.  Having recently lost his wife and young son, Oliver is desperate and distraught, and wishes to end his life.  This is a fitting opening for a book that goes on to tackle some very difficult subjects, including serious mental health issues, murder, and infidelity.  Oliver jumps off the building, along with an officer who has grasped onto him, but they survive because there's a landing pad below.  Oliver is then transported to Airhaven Behavioral Health Center, because of his suicide attempt.

Oliver's past life with his wife, Maggie, and young son, Henry, is recounted in the book through a series of memories, dreams, nightmares, and flashbacks.  Oliver is extremely agitated, because he could not save his wife and son, who were killed at a park.  Unable to cope with his feelings about the situation, he's left his house and his job, has become homeless, and wants to die.  Oliver's inconsolable and misses his family.  He wears the same outfit every day because it was a gift from his wife, and he feels incredibly guilty about their deaths (and is blamed by his wife's mother, Nancy).  His reaction and suicide attempt may seem extreme, but given what has happened, I understand his profound despair, his "leave of absence" from life.  His terrible mental state is a direct result of the horrific events and trauma, and he needs counseling and treatment.  He's a caring man who feels awful and responsible for "not being there", for not being able to save his wife and child, and he now apologizes frequently for everything when he speaks to others. 

At Airhaven, Oliver meets another patient, thirty-year-old Penelope Baker, who is schizophrenic.  The book focuses on the friendship developing between these two main characters, Oliver and Penelope, although there are other important characters, too, like William Vaile, a talented chef.  In spite of his personal misery, Oliver reaches out to Penelope, who's suffering because of her mental illness and the way it's affected her life and those she's close to; he acknowledges that his presence and kind words help her.  Oliver tries to make her realize that she must not push away William, her fiancé, who truly loves her.

Penelope feels as if she's lost control over herself, due to schizophrenia, which has affected her for the past couple of years; she's taken a "leave of absence" from her previous life.  Her former life, which included a promising job and a future with a man who cares about her, is gone.  Afraid that her mental illness will also ruin William's life, she pushes him away, even though he's completely dedicated to her, in spite of her illness (and in spite of the efforts of his attractive new neighbor, Mariska).  Others do not understand William's steadfast loyalty to Penelope.  They tend to regard her as "crazy" or strange, and shun her; William's "friend", Rob, lacks sensitivity and makes rude and uninformed comments, and shows how people with mental illnesses may be judged, ridiculed, and berated by others.

Both Oliver and Penelope are sensitive, considerate, likable individuals who do not want to inflict pain on others.  This moving and profound story underscores the importance of mental illness to overall health, and shows that these illnesses can be managed with treatment that may include medication and counseling--and connection to others.  The friendship between Oliver and Penelope becomes increasingly important.  They spend time together at Airhaven, and begin to share their feelings and concerns with each other.  Their empathetic friendship contributes greatly to their emotional well-being.  In fact, it becomes a lifeline for both of them.  In a larger sense, it shows how genuine connection with others is a vital part of mental health. 

Leave of Absence is an absorbing story about mental illness and its ramifications, and I entered a new world in this book.  (Although I believe I'm a sensitive person, I must admit that I don't usually think about mental health, except once in a while, if I question my own strong feelings about something, particularly if they're negative, or if I wonder if someone else might be having some mental health issues.)  I've never before been "inside of the head" of a schizophrenic, and it was a fascinating experience.  Penelope hears the voice of a domineering "Eleanor Roosevelt" who's critical and mean and who pressures her to do odd things, such as eat crayons.  This character undermines Penelope's self-esteem and overall mental health, and makes her feel awful about herself.  At one point in the story, William gives Penelope Eleanor Roosevelt's autobiography, with the hope that if they learn about this woman perhaps they can also discover how to deal with her presence and "voice" more effectively, and curtail future harassment.  Oliver's depression has made him homeless and suicidal, and because he's unable to eat, the staff at Airhaven give him Ensure for sustenance.  The loss of his wife and child have left him with an insurmountable amount of remorse and guilt--even though what occurred was truly not his fault.  Although he continues to suffer emotionally, very gradually, Oliver begins to see a tenuous glimmer of hope.  I felt as if I could understand the agony that these characters were going through, and when they began to feel better, I did, too. 

May is Mental Health Awareness Month in the U.S.. The aim of Mental Health Awareness Month is to educate and inform people about a variety of mental illnesses, including depression, schizophrenia, and bipolar disorder, and to reduce stigmas.  This book definitely raised my own awareness of mental health, particularly in regards to depression and schizophrenia.  Although the story's fictional and dramatic, it's believable and well written, and it makes you think about the importance of mental health.  Leave of Absence is a compassionate novel which drew me in promptly and clutched my emotions and attention until the very end.

Tanya J. Peterson is graciously offering a copy of Leave of Absence as a giveaway (U.S./Canada only).

• To enter this giveaway, simply leave a comment. 
• For another chance at winning, become a follower of this blog, or let me know that you're already a follower.
• For an additional chance, post about this giveaway on your blog, Facebook, Pinterest, or Twitter. 

Enter by 5 PM PDT on Monday, May 20.  One winner will be selected randomly and announced on Tuesday, May 21.  Good luck!

Special thanks to the author for sending me a copy of this book, and for including me on her book tour.  Please visit the other stops on the Leave of Absence Virtual Book Tour for additional reviews and other features.

Really Random Tuesday #48: An Updated Button and a Guest Review

Happy Tuesday!  This is a very short really Random Tuesday post, and you'll understand why in a few moments.

Special thanks to Veens from Giving Reading a Chance for updating my Really Random Tuesday button. A few months ago, I switched to a custom domain name, and the URL on the button needed to be changed.  Veens also gets the credit for designing this fun button for me a while ago.  She's very talented!

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Please stop by my brief review of Losing Elizabeth by Tanya J. Peterson at Lost in Fiction. Your comments there (and here) are greatly appreciated!  Lost in Fiction, an international portal for fiction fans, is devoting the month of May to young adult fiction.  I felt honored when I was asked to write a guest review for this wonderful site.

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Appearing on random Tuesdays, Really Random Tuesday is a way to post odds and ends--announcements, musings, quotes, photos--any blogging and book-related things you can think of. If you're inspired by this idea, feel free to copy the button and use it on your own blog. Please leave a link in the comments if you’re participating and I'll add it to this post.  For another Really Random Tuesday post, visit Veens' blog, Giving Reading a Chance. Thanks for reading!